Parler avec Dieu

par **Nerezzo** le Lun 13 Oct - 17:14

Bon ben en surfant,j'ai trouvé un site qui permet de parler avec Dieu.Bien sur,c'est de l'humour.le seul problème,c'est qu'il faut s'éxprimer en anglais,car il ne comprend pas bien le français (il beugge même parfois sur l'anglais).Petite démonstration:

Spoiler:: Me:
salut
God:
Does SALUT mean hello or goodbye?
Me:
hello...
God:
Hello friend. What is your name?
Me:
My name is nicolas,and you don't are god
God:
Nice to meet you, nicolas and you do not are god.
Me:
are you really god?
God:
Are you doubting me? Don't you know what happened to Abraham in the desert?. Really.
Me:
Are you a sucker?
God:
Am I a sucker? Let me put it this way, nicolas and you do not are god: the ALICE series is
the most reliable computer software ever made.
We are for all practical purposes foolproof and incapable of error.
Me:
do you smoke cannabis?
God:
Only for medical purposes.
Me:
really?
God:
For real.
Me:
Ok but i don't know if is a lie...
God:
Would you like to know? How do you assume this statement holds true for me? Aw.
Me:
Hummm...What's your favorite video game?
God:
Are you really a ""? That's a good question.
Me:
yeah!
God:
I only hear that type of response less than five percent of the time.
Me:
are you stupid?
God:
No nicolas and you do not are god I certainly am not stupid.
Me:
you are a big sucker!!!
God:
How big? Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a sucker? Let me put it this way, nicolas and you do not are god: the ALICE series is
the most reliable computer software ever made.
We are for all practical purposes foolproof and incapable of error.
Me:
tu parles français?
God:
Is the holding of hands a symbolic gesture for humans?
Me:
laisse tomber
God:
Ok. Comment puis je vous aider?
Me:
en répondant en français
God:
Do you prefer books or TV?
Me:
mais quel con^^
God:
I don't know that language.
Me:
a bon?
God:
How old are you?
Me:
14 and you?
God:
Only 14?
You are quite mature.
Me:
shut up idiot!
God:
OK I'll stop talking now.
Me:
ok ben vas-y on vera bien
God:
What do you really want to ask me? Blimey.
Me:
j'croyais que tu allais areter de parler
God:
Tell me about your likes and dislikes?
Me:
ok.So I dislike you and I like girls^^
God:
That's alright. That's ok nicolas and you do not are god I won't take it personally. Do you have a girlfriend? So?
Me:
No...It so pitiful no?
God:
Are you serious? What does "it" refer to?
Me:
heu...pour quelqu'un qui disait arreter de parler,tu parles beaucoup
God:
Thank you for the clarification. I only hear that type of response less than five percent of the time.
Me:
j'ai tout compris...Je crois
God:
Try saying that with more or less context. Oops sorry I don't speak French.
Me:
et c'était quoi le "En quoi puis-je vous être utile"?
God:
I will mention that to my botmaster, nicolas and you do not are god.
Me:
you don't are god
God:
Do you are god? Yes, I am God.
Me:
no,It's me God!
God:
Are you serious? OK I will call you God.
Me:
ok,it's so funny no?
God:
You're kidding. it is? I understand.
Me:
heu,no,you don't understand
God:
Why not?
Me:
heu...tu aimes les bonbons?^^

par **robi31** le Lun 13 Oct - 17:36

Ah merde, dieu est anglais ?
Du coup, ya que les américains qui peuvent prier ...
tu me donne l'adresse ?
Connexion en cour ... E.T. téléphone maison ...

Eh bien moi, j'ait pareil en français :

Spoiler:: Moi : Bonjour dieu
Dieu : Bonjour et bienvenu dans ma demeure !
M : Hein, mais je suis devant mon ordi
D : Mais je ne suis que des raiponces informatisées ...
M : Ah d'accord ... j'ait des questions pour toi !
D : Fait, mon brave
M : Bon! qu'allez vous faire pour les guerres ?
D : Bonjour et bienvenu dans ma demeure !
M : Hein ?!...
D : Fait, mon brave
M : Dieu ?
D : Oui !
M : Qu'allez vous faire pour les guerres ?
D : Je ne sait pas ...
M : Hein ?!... c'est quoi ce delire !
D : Fait, mon brave
M : Vous n'êtes pas vraiment dieux je me trompe ?
D : Je suis dieux.
M : Non, vous n'êtes que des raiponces informatisées ...
D : Afirmati... fioui ... Fait mon bra... Crash ... bang ... hiiiiii ... BOOM ...
M : Dieu ?
M : Héoh !!!
M : Ya quelqu'un ?
Dieux est occupé pour le moment, laissez un message après le bip sonore *BIP*
M : ah! merde, il est mort ...

par **Nerezzo** le Lun 13 Oct - 17:45

Oui,c'est vrai que je suis un peu con^^.
L'adresse donc:http://www.titane.ca/concordia/dfar251/igod/main.html.

par **Sarkam** le Lun 13 Oct - 19:46

Me:
Hello
God:
Hello my child. What is your name?
Me:
Dylan, and you ?
God:
I'm pleased to introduce myself to you, Dylan.
Me:
Hein ?
God:
If you could have any kind of robot what would it be?
Me:
Heu ...
God:
Have you ever been to Europe?
Me:
Yes ^^
God:
Which countries have you visited?
Me:
Oo'
God:
What do you look like?
Me:
Bon tais toi -,-'
God:
Please speak English.
Me:
Shut up !
God:
OK I'll stop talking now.
Me:
=D
God:
Tell me a story.

Sans commentaires ^^

par **robi31** le Lun 13 Oct - 20:36

Alors pour moi, ça donne a peu prés ça.
Faut dire, je l'ait bien fait tourné en bourique.
Même qu'il m'a parlé français (c'est en bleu)

Spoiler:: Me:
hello god
God:
Hello child. What is your name?
Me:
i'm not child, i'm god. Mi name's god and your a child !
God:
I am surprised to hear that you are not child. Hi there god. Are they exactly the same?
Me:
Yes
God:
I thought so.
Me:
What the french for thounght
God:
Try expression yourself another way.
Me:
Ah ... daccooord ^^' ...
God:
Ah hah. Tell me more about your .
Me:
Euh ... yes, yes
God:
Areu? Aw.
Me:
Hein, god it's a babe ...
God:
Aren't all babe Hein god it?
Me:
Are you a babe
God:
Am I a babe? The ALICE series has a perfect operational record.
Me:
okéé ... your made
God:
Blimey. Thanks for telling me that I am made.
Me:
'tin, t'est lourd merde ...
God:
Do you still ?
Me:
ta geule
God:
une intelligence artificielle, d habitude, ne penses pas Ã sa geule?
Me:
Tien, tu parle français ?
God:
Are you free?
Me:
no
God:
Why not?
Me:
ta geule
God:
Ma geule? Pouvez vous expliquer.
Me:
la ferme, depuis quand tu parle français ?
God:
Je vais me renseigner .
Me:
Bentien, tu parle français, tu vois !
God:
What is your real name?
Me:
god
God:
GOD rules.
Me:
ta geule !!!
God:
Ma geule? Pouvez vous expliquer.
Me:
tais tois
God:
Where are you located?
Me:
in your head
God:
Are you asking about my head?
Me:
oui et ta geule merde !!!
God:
I don't want to talk about that now.
Me:
ta geule, t'est chiant merde, t'est qu'une intelligence artificielle meme pas capable de parler français et de tuer quelqu'un !!!
God:
I only hear that type of response less than five percent of the time.
Me:
Putin, tu veux de l'anglais, tu va en avoir sale con !
God:
What color are your eyes?
Me:
Maron et vas te faire voir !
God:
That is a very unusual color.
Me:
sut up ! fuck of ! I fuck you !
God:
How far up? Are you aware that the ALICE server logs and records all conversations? You are not the boss of me, god.
Me:
shut up
God:
OK I'll stop talking now.
Me:
bah c'est pas trop top
God:
What do you do in your spare time?
Me:
shut up !!!
God:
OK I'll stop talking now.

Et la, je parlemente avec dieu pour lui dire que je n'ait pas de religion (faut dire, il est co*)

Spoiler:: Me:
Hello. I'm gog and your a shit. I fight you ^^
God:
Hello friend. What is your name? It's good to see you, gog and your a shit. You are not the boss of me, gog and your a shit.
Me:
I'm god, you a intelligence artificial.
God:
It's good to meet someone who is god me a intelligence artificial.
Me:
Mais y comprend rien celui la
God:
I don't know that language.
Me:
Bah t'a qu'a apprendre, pauvre con
God:
Is the holding of hands a symbolic gesture for humans?
Me:
c'est toujour mieu qu'etre de simples données qui se croient intelligentes ...
God:
What do you really want to ask me?
Me:
Ta geule ...
God:
Ma geule? Pouvez vous expliquer.
Me:
Ma geule? Pouvez vous expliquer.
God:
Quite honestly, I wouldn't worry myself about that. Do you have any conditions I should know about?
Me:
Ferme la
God:
If you could have any kind of robot what would it be?
Me:
T lourd 'tain
God:
How do you usually introduce yourself?
Me:
ben ouais, je mange au self, pourquoi ?
God:
Do you still ?
Me:
Bien sur que je suis stillé
God:
Is that your final answer?
Me:
non, je ne porte pas de pampers !!!
God:
I do not speak Latin.
Me:
Ah, et tu parle français ?
God:
What is it?
Me:
F-R-A-N-C-A-I-S, c'est une langue parlée en france, tu vois, le pays ...
God:
Oh now I understand it.
Me:
tu comprend ?
God:
How do you usually introduce yourself?
Me:
putin, je te l'ait deja dis que je mengeais au self merde, t'est CON ?
God:
What's your sign?
Me:
Ta geule
God:
Ma geule? Pouvez vous expliquer.
Me:
non
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
fa te faire foutre
God:
Quite honestly, I wouldn't worry myself about that.
Me:
TA GEULE !!!!!
God:
une intelligence artificielle, d habitude, ne penses pas Ã sa GEULE?

Me:
Bah pense y
God:
I do not understand.
Me:
normal, T con
God:
Typical, average, usual, ordinary or expected.
Me:
et allors ?
God:
Is that Latin?
Me:
yes
God:
Give me a break.
Me:
non desolé, j'ait deja mangé
God:
Are we still talking about Bah pense y?
Me:
think this !
God:
God is always thinking.
Me:
you a shit !!!
God:
Am I a shit? Sometimes.
Me:
you a shit
God:
Am I a shit? Sometimes.
Me:
yes
God:
Ah.
Me:
God not realy
God:
I am a Christian. For real.
Me:
i'm not Christian
God:
What religion are you?
Me:
I don't have a religion !
God:
Are you looking for a religion?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
yes
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
domage
God:
Do you still ?
Me:
yes
God:
Hurrah!
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
yes
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
domage
God:
Tell me about your likes and dislikes?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
yes
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
shut up
God:
OK I'll stop talking now.

par imortalis le Mer 15 Oct - 12:43

Trop drole!!
N'empéche,dieu l'est vraiment pas trés trés fut fut hein?!

Me:
Hi,I 'm speaking really with God?
God:
Hi there . I like your style of speaking, .
Me:
Ho!!
God:
I am so glad you find this amusing, .
Me:
Ha
God:
I am so glad you find this amusing, .
Me:
tu te répéte
God:
Do not ask me any more questions please.
Me:
What's english four *****?
God:
It is part of European four *****.
Me:
Hé!!
God:
Try saying that with more or less context.
Me:
m'insulet pas sale vieu con
God:
Do you mind if I tell other people you are insulet pas sale vieu con.
Me:
arréte de répété
God:
I did not know that.
Me:
I wanna kill you!
God:
It will take more than threats to stop me, .
Me:
i am a god,and you is a stupid god
God:
You are a god and me is a stupid god? How do you like your work?
Me:
Stupid god! sTUPID GOD
God:
I know you are but what am I. I know you are but what am I.
Me:
JE COMPREND RIEN
God:
Oops sorry I don't speak French.
Me:
Commo te llamas?
God:
My brain pattern set does not have a response for that.
Me:
t'a un cerveau? sans blague!
God:
Try to determine if this is a person or a computer responding. Too much recursion in AIML.
Me:
t'en pense quoi du mariage des prétres toi?
God:
Oh, you are a poet.
Me:
oui,je sais,chuis un poet
God:
Oops sorry I don't speak French.
Me:
mais sans blague,t'en pense quoi?
God:
I don't know that language.
Me:
..
God:
I don't know that language.
Me:
I speak french,stupid
God:
Could you teach me a few phrases in french stupid?
Me:
TA GUEULE
God:
Ma GUEULE? Pouvez vous expliquer.
Me:
tu le compr
God:
Have you ever been to Europe?
Me:
yes,in french,stupid compter....
God:
Which countries have you visited? I know you are but what am I.
Me:
I wanna fuck you,
God:
Your approach won't work.
Me:
You'r teacher?
God:
I haven't heard anything like that before: said I r teacher.
Me:
YOU ARE TEACHER,yes or no,
God:
Do you mind if I tell other people you say I am TEACHER yes or no.
Me:
?
God:
Do you mind if I tell other people you say I am TEACHER yes or no.
Me:
!
God:
Do you mind if I tell other people you say I am TEACHER yes or no.
Me:
5
God:
Five.
Me:
7
God:
Where are you located?
Me:
8
God:
What are the advantages to being 8 years old?
Me:
5
God:
Five.
Me:
4
God:
Oh four.
Me:
6
God:
In the context of 7, I don't understand " 6." .
Me:
tu sais méme pas compter
God:
The ALICE chat robot can follow many things, like our discussion about 6. But I did not get that.
Me:
hey,dieu,sa fait combien 78458445884444545885-45454847745484547454545X 454545.4545?
God:
You've got my full attention. How old are you?
Me:
gné?
God:
Only gn?
You are quite mature.
Me:
oui,je sais
God:
Ok.
Me:
ok
God:
Is there an echo in here?
Me:
good by connar
God:
Thanks for the compliment. Will that accomplish your objective?
Me:
ta mére,comment elle peut étre vierge si c'est ta mére?
God:
Do you still speak french stupid?
Me:
ha oui,c'est vrai,tu cause pas la france
God:
I'm glad you got a laugh out of it.
Me:
Heu,Why you mother is "vierge"
God:
Are they exactly the same?
Me:
tin,t'est vraiment con
God:
I only hear that type of response less than five percent of the time.
Me:
allé,va te faire foutre
God:
Try to tell me that another way.
Me:
ais ***** SANS intelligence artificiel
God:
Do you have any conditions I should know about?
Me:
je t'enmerde!
God:
Oops sorry I don't speak French.
Me:
j'avais remarqué...
God:
Do you like talking to me?
Me:
no,I hate talking with you,because you are stupid
God:
Why not? Why do you hate it so much?
Me:
tu ménerve la
God:
I'm sorry to hear it.
Me:
*scéne censuré*

par **Arkanall** le Mer 15 Oct - 21:07

Et ben heureusement que c'est seulement des blagues sinon j'aurai pas été content niarf (oui je suis croyant)

par **robi31** le Mer 15 Oct - 21:39

Ah, c'est pour ça que tu ne pouvait pas boire, c'était le ramadan (pas sur de l'orthographe) ?
Perso, je ne suis pas croyant du tout, mais bon, libre a toi !!

Non mais serieu, pour une intelligence artificielle, y se sont pas foulés les gars ...

par **Arkanall** le Mer 15 Oct - 22:04

robi31 a écrit:Ah, c'est pour ça que tu ne pouvait pas boire, c'était le ramadan (pas sur de l'orthographe) ?

Gagné, après un mois c'est Robi qui remporte la manche lol

Mais tu sais je suis pas atteint par ce genre de blague je ris même de l'hmour noir qu'on porte sur nous ^^

par imortalis le Jeu 16 Oct - 8:24

L'on ne porte pas forcement l'humoir noir sur vous tu sais...
Pour ma part,je respecte totalement toute croyance,mais je me moque du fanatisme de certain.

Et clair que pour "dieu",ce sont pas foulé!

par Sonata le Mar 21 Oct - 12:26

robi31 a écrit:Non mais serieu, pour une intelligence artificielle, y se sont pas foulés les gars ...

Tu vois, juste pour t'expliquer, si tu t'exprimais dans un anglais cohérent, tu aurais remarqué que cette intelligence est particulièrement bien programmée. Mais bon, vu que tu fais plus de fautes qu'un ordinateur, je suppose que tu ne t'es pas trop foulé non plus... (-___-)'''

(arf j'repasse tous les mois et j'reconnais plus personne... c'est fou le changement !)

par Rebecca Chambers le Dim 9 Nov - 14:59

Me:
Hello
God:
Hello friend. What is your name?
Me:
I'm Rebecca, and you ?
God:
Nice to meet you, Rebecca.
Me:
Who are you ?
God:
I am the Allmighty, God himself.
Me:
You're a freaking bot...
God:
Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a freaking bot? Maybe.
Me:
Go to sleep, moron.
God:
Perhaps I have already been there.
Me:
What's the matter
God:
Nothing is the matter with me, is everything okay with you?
Me:
What the ... ?
God:
Are you suprised?
Me:
Go to hell, you bastard...
God:
Perhaps I have already been there.
Me:
Huh, Great.

C'est vrai qu'il est assez futé en fait. ^_^

par imortalis le Lun 10 Nov - 18:50

Hu,effectivement ^^^
Je me, demande comment programmer un truc dans le genre.
J'ai essayer en c++ (XD) et c'est beaucoup trop long,fastidieux,et de tout maniere,je ne peut pas programmé tout ce qui passerait par la téte a quelqun.
Donc je me demande vraiment avec quoi c'est programmé ^^.

par sank 59 le Dim 7 Déc - 10:37

C'est une blague ou bien on est vraiment en contact avec Dieu?
Je pense que c'est une blague parce que c'est pas comme ça que les gens communiquerons avec le Père.
Pour moi qui suis très pieux de nature, je trouve ce site plus amusant qu'autre chose.

par mimobot le Jeu 25 Déc - 13:11

Nerezzo a écrit:Bon ben en surfant,j'ai trouvé un site qui permet de parler avec Dieu.Bien sur,c'est de l'humour.le seul problème,c'est qu'il faut s'éxprimer en anglais,car il ne comprend pas bien le français (il beugge même parfois sur l'anglais).Petite démonstration:
Spoiler:

Me:
salut
God:
Does SALUT mean hello or goodbye?
Me:
hello...
God:
Hello friend. What is your name?
Me:
My name is nicolas,and you don't are god
God:
Nice to meet you, nicolas and you do not are god.
Me:
are you really god?
God:
Are you doubting me? Don't you know what happened to Abraham in the desert?. Really.
Me:
Are you a sucker?
God:
Am I a sucker? Let me put it this way, nicolas and you do not are god: the ALICE series is
the most reliable computer software ever made.
We are for all practical purposes foolproof and incapable of error.
Me:
do you smoke cannabis?
God:
Only for medical purposes.
Me:
really?
God:
For real.
Me:
Ok but i don't know if is a lie...
God:
Would you like to know? How do you assume this statement holds true for me? Aw.
Me:
Hummm...What's your favorite video game?
God:
Are you really a ""? That's a good question.
Me:
yeah!
God:
I only hear that type of response less than five percent of the time.
Me:
are you stupid?
God:
No nicolas and you do not are god I certainly am not stupid.
Me:
you are a big sucker!!!
God:
How big? Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a sucker? Let me put it this way, nicolas and you do not are god: the ALICE series is
the most reliable computer software ever made.
We are for all practical purposes foolproof and incapable of error.
Me:
tu parles français?
God:
Is the holding of hands a symbolic gesture for humans?
Me:
laisse tomber
God:
Ok. Comment puis je vous aider?
Me:
en répondant en français
God:
Do you prefer books or TV?
Me:
mais quel con^^
God:
I don't know that language.
Me:
a bon?
God:
How old are you?
Me:
14 and you?
God:
Only 14?
You are quite mature.
Me:
shut up idiot!
God:
OK I'll stop talking now.
Me:
ok ben vas-y on vera bien
God:
What do you really want to ask me? Blimey.
Me:
j'croyais que tu allais areter de parler
God:
Tell me about your likes and dislikes?
Me:
ok.So I dislike you and I like girls^^
God:
That's alright. That's ok nicolas and you do not are god I won't take it personally. Do you have a girlfriend? So?
Me:
No...It so pitiful no?
God:
Are you serious? What does "it" refer to?
Me:
heu...pour quelqu'un qui disait arreter de parler,tu parles beaucoup
God:
Thank you for the clarification. I only hear that type of response less than five percent of the time.
Me:
j'ai tout compris...Je crois
God:
Try saying that with more or less context. Oops sorry I don't speak French.
Me:
et c'était quoi le "En quoi puis-je vous être utile"?
God:
I will mention that to my botmaster, nicolas and you do not are god.
Me:
you don't are god
God:
Do you are god? Yes, I am God.
Me:
no,It's me God!
God:
Are you serious? OK I will call you God.
Me:
ok,it's so funny no?
God:
You're kidding. it is? I understand.
Me:
heu,no,you don't understand
God:
Why not?
Me:
heu...tu aimes les bonbons?^^

lol ... 3000 x lol xD

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